C.M

GHOST

i’ve started to drag my 
feet lately because 
the wind doesn’t feel as fresh
the sky is hazy &
my taste buds are skewed

outside the kids bumble and dance, 
reddened cheeks, sweaty heads
they run with the wild dogs
but sometimes i can only walk

safety, all-knowing, a 
proponent for answers, a guiding hand;

these are all the things i look for as the world moves.

in and out
out and in
my mind chugs over what i could have done
i imagine the pitted stomachache,
the laundry you left in the sink

did you think
of the ghost 
you’d be?

footprints dust the floorboards
a shuffle of playthings scatter the halls
but i harvest most resentment from the 
portraits, undisturbed 

the kids, thank god, 
energize me 
running hugs, sticky kisses
salvation from myself

unfortunately,
i underestimate the sunset
the stillness that it brings
the children puff sweet breaths in bed, 
as i flip off lamps and close the shades
the house begins to speak of you
and i waver to my knees

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